“I am as insecure and touchy as a hunchback or a dwarf, and yet there have been moments when if I had been slapped, I might even have been glad of it. I say it seriously: surely I'd have managed to deliver some sort of pleasure in it as well – the pleasure of despair, of course, but it is in despair that the most burning pleasures occur, especially when one is all too highly conscious of the hopelessness of one's position. And here, by this slap, you'll simply be crushed by the consciousness of what sort of slime you've been reduced too.” (Richard Pevear,10.)
This quote illustrates a few things about our main character in the book. Firstly, it demonstrates a huge part of who he is. He admits to the audience that he is insecure. Sometimes, people who feel less superior then others often take out their anger on others and strive to make themselves more powerful so that they can feel more secure.
[...] It almost seems from reading the book that he won't even partake in an activity unless it can bring him some sort of power, control or success over another person. The man is clearly obsessed with rank as well, and looks for jobs where he can maneuver up the rank and be in some sort of control of others. Even at the man's desk job, he wouldn't stop belittling others until he felt that he was in control. It clearly indicates his need for rank over others – even if it was just imagined. References Dostoyevsky, Fyodor, Richard Pevear, and Larissa Volokhonsky. Notes from Underground. New York: Vintage, 1994. Print. [...]
[...] In the beginning, he discusses being not being sure that he wants to take revenge on someone or not, and not being sure he even could be in control of another person. The above text illustrates a need for deeper power and control, even if it's only getting chucked out of the window in a fight. Few people fight unless it's for one of a few reasons. The first reason might be because they are in a bad situation and need to get out of there fast. The second reason might be for self-defense. [...]
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