I'm Wallace Kirkman. There's really nothing too wrong with me. Granted, I am scarred for life from my Mother committing suicide when I was six years old. But that only messed me up a little. I mean, coming home from school in the second grade to your mother half naked in a pool of blood is bad, but I'm really not psychotic or crazy or anything like that. Sometimes I wish I could be. That way at least I'd have a real excuse for why I can't talk to girls very well. It all stems from my Mom and the fact that she “offed” herself. I can literally go through a series of steps for any problem and show you how it's her fault. I kind of feel that it's my fault that she died sometimes. Like if somehow I could have prevented it…
[...] She also removed the stigma of having sex, which helped ease the tension I had talking to girls. She said I was too weird for her and said I should meet her sister. Nina turns out to be the first girl I truly fall in love with. She cares about me. Although I don't know it at the time, she is what I've been looking for: beautiful, caring, loving, and most of all motherly. Unfortunately, I lose Nina because I cheat on her with someone who didn't matter at all to me- Wendy. [...]
[...] of glassware for their wedding. I thought about how there was so much glass. Then I started thinking of my Mother and all of the sudden I saw her there, in the glass! She was just laughing at me. I whipped it at the ground and watched it explode into a million pieces of light. Staring at it, I began thinking of how glass is made of sand and I rather enjoyed the feel of sand in between my toes. [...]
[...] That girl drove me crazy and was the start of this terrifying reputation I quickly got. What a crappy way to start your social life, huh? This perpetuated the long line of problems that my Mother caused by killing herself. She thought she could get rid of all her problems by killing herself, but instead she just pushed them all off onto me. Now not only am I a socially inept and emotionally unstable kid, but I can't talk to girls in any meaningful way. [...]
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